Extreme Marriage Counselling

This program is essentially our normal couples counselling services but more intense in number of sessions and session length. For many couples, the damage that has been done to their relationship is extensive and has been lasting. When you ask for this type of counselling, we are expecting you to put in the effort over a long period of time and to not expect immediate results. Change takes time, but is possible, when you do the right things. 


Minimum session length is 3 hours / Maximum session length is 6 hours


The cost of Extreme Marriage Counselling is $400 per hour plus GST.


As this type of counselling is for crisis situations, the counsellor will make special arrangements to get you in quickly. Booking you in on a day that they would generally be unavailable, such as a Monday or Friday.


Counsellors available for Extreme Counselling are Darren Wilk and Lawrence Stoyanowski.


 This includes:

  • Individual face-to-face counselling sessions in our Langley, BC office to re-establish a foundation for your relationship. This is necessary because of the intensity of the issues and emotions involved in resolving these early problems. For those at a distance we suggest you consider intensive/marathon therapy sessions.
  • We have developed our counselling/coaching approach around the research of John Gottman, who has spent 35 years studying what works in relationships. This scientific ‘nuts and bolts’ approach to working with couples ensures that you are provided with tools that get results.
  • Email interaction and projects.
  • Access to a clients only area of this web site to research further into the Gottman Method.



You will be expected to:

  • Do weekly homework
  • Participate fully in all appointments
  • Commit to having a better relationship
  • Inform your coach if you are not understanding something or if he is missing something

Topics Include:

  1. Understanding personality differences
  2. How to build passion and love back into the relationship
  3. How to solve or dialogue effectively about any issue you face
  4. Learning about love languages and how to discover yours
  5. How to process failed bids for connection
  6. Building a shared meaning system that propels you into a more fulfilling future.

Of course, this is only a partial list of what is covered in marriage counselling sessions.



You Will Learn:

  • How your personality styles effects your relationship and what to do about it
  • How to identify patterns such as the “closeness/distance dance”, “control/responsibility”, “it’s not you it’s me” concept, “Artist/scientist”, and the “conventional vs unconventionality dilemma”
  • About simple negotiation techniques
  • How to identify and find antidotes for the “Four Horsemen; Contempt, Criticism, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling.”
  • About your “Friendship Profile”, the “Conflict Profile”, and the “Shared Meanings Profile”.
  • How to resolve the “physiological flooding” and anxious feelings that accompany many relationships
  • To successfully dialogue about grid-locked conflicts
  • Establish six social skills necessary for effective conflict resolution.
  • To love unconditionally with no strings attached
  • Stages of forgiveness and how to apologize and mean it
  • How to deepen the ‘Friendship System”
  • How to develop and create a shared system of values and meanings.

If you are ready to undertake these expectations and would like to see the above tools and principles developed in your relationship, call us at 604-539-5277 to set up an initial session.


Don’t  live in our area? We can still help — see our page on intensive/marathon counselling sessions and call us today for further information. We also offer professional advice and guidance on dealing with affairs, depression, addiction, trauma and violent behavior.

Not in the Langley Area?

We offer intensive multi-day marathon counselling or couples workshops in multiple cities across British Columbia and Alberta.


Don’t throw in the towel – your relationship is worth fighting for

Even though it is easy to lose hope in finding a way out, there is light at the end of the tunnel. Our job is to help you find it.